A Millennial Exploration: Depression (Day 4)

A fear most humans have is being capable of extraordinary feats, but unable to do anything because of paralyzation. Whether it’s due to a physical handicap, or mental lapse, we experience a state of “depression” when we are impaired in the midst of a vibrant world.

Depression, according to Mayo Clinic, is a mood disorder that causes a persistent feeling of sadness and loss of interest. Expectations become withered and fragile. Priorities are shuffled and scattered. Stimuli fights for attention; only to lose. Everything and nothing works. The dichotomy between freedom and bondage still exists for someone going through depression — but bondage has an overwhelming advantage.

My understanding of depression is mostly anecdotal. Meaning I’ve experienced being overwhelm, sad, and in a funk before, but never anything I would subscribe as full blown depression. Like most people, my knowledge on depression stems from teen-dramas on Netflix, Google, and few personal conversations. With that being said, I don’t live under a rock. Mood changes and depressed faces pilfer my social media timeline and have became a core theme in modern media.

Even with an endorsement from media, depression needs no “click bait” to become mainstream. We (humans) are more susceptible to share and ponder on darkness rather than light. Maybe it’s due to our inclination to fix what’s broken, or our narcism that makes us the center of someone else’s tribulation. Whatever the reason is, it’s becoming more and more normalized. Almost to the point that everyone is claiming “depression” and “anxiety” for any situation that decreases happiness. For a mental disorder that’s linked to suicides, I wouldn’t think we would want to take this matter lightly.

So what do we do? Or need to say? Or need to learn?

I suppose we would need to begin with the “experts”. Unfortunately, what experts may call an issue of the mind, I would argue it’s an issue of the heart. If the initial diagnosis is invalid you can’t begin to receive appropriate treatment for an ailment. At best temporary relief overcomes you; at worst there is a facade of “all is well” while internally decaying. Why do I say it’s a “heart issue”? Hear me out. Brain surgery never fixed suicide. And I get it, neither has heart surgery. So when I say “heart” I’m really referring to someone’s spirit — the intangible-inner aura of a person. The mainframe of every human being.

An expert may mention depression is a condition stemming from work stress, personal tendencies, or trauma. I would kinda agree. It does have some sort of root: lack of expectation. Mentally speaking, we take a “hit” when our expectations aren’t met. Whether it be driving on the road and you expected to have enough gas to make it to your destination. Or you expected the latte from Starbucks to not have foam but sadly, it did. Expectation is the catalyst of our perception. Perception shapes our reality. Our reality is where we dwell. The beauty in this is that “our reality”, although we live in it and are shaped by it, is not necessarily the “truth” — bear with me.

Truth is not relative. Truth is not my perceptional reality versus your perceptional reality. How do I know this? Because two plus two equals four regardless of fundamental differences in our realities. Also the world is round regardless of what the skeptical “flat-Earthers” say. This demonstrates truth is an equalizer for all our scattered thoughts and ambitions. Thus, we should seek the truth in order to establish a common ground between all things.

And the truth is there is a God and we all have fallen short of His glory. Which means we all have failed to meet the standard of a just, righteous, and holy being. Definitely something we wouldn’t expect to do — but unfortunately we are on autopilot when it comes to disregarding God’s will. This debunks our boasting of being “deserving” of an easy life or seeing ourselves as blameless “good people”. Our expectation of control should be hanging on by a thread now. Yet, that same expectation is still contributing to our perception of a false reality. In simple terms: everything is outside of our control, even if we convince ourselves otherwise.

For someone reading this (possibly even battling depression) it may seem counterproductive to use “everything is outside of our control” as a premise for a remedy. But the fact is: that’s the remedy. Whatever caused me to feel overwhelm, sad, or in a funk isn’t specific to me and I don’t have a monopoly to grief — so why would I weep indefinitely? I’m also a unique vessel, so my life can’t be insignificant: God has awarded me undeniable joy and unmerited favor through a curated series of life events.

I understand now that uniqueness validates purpose. There’s only one me. And although God can raise up rocks to worship Him and the splendor of lilies surpasses Solomon’s kingdom, His preference is working through humanity. We (humans) cannot derail God’s hand, nor can we command God as though he were a man, but we can contribute. For example, Mark Zukerberg created Facebook and revolutionized how people connect, but even if he didn’t create Facebook communication and connection wouldn’t be lost. Contributions modify existing environments, no matter how “advanced” they may seem — nothing is new under the sun.

Be encouraged in things you can’t control. Even what’s important and fulfilling to me isn’t a product of my own will nor my own resources. Which is disclosed in the following verses:

• For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God.
  (Heb. 3:14 ESV)
• But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. (Matt. 5:44–45 ESV)
• John answered, “A person cannot receive even one thing unless it is given him from heaven. (John 3:27 ESV)
• All things were made through him, and without him was not any thing made that was made. (John 1:3)

Nor are my calamities always a result of my negligence or guilty hands. Which is disclosed in the following verses.

• Everyone who comes to me and hears my words and does them, I will show you what he is like: he is like a man building a house, who dug deep and laid the foundation on the rock. And when a flood arose, the stream broke against that house and could not shake it, because it had been well built. But the one who hears and does not do them is like a man who built a house on the ground without a foundation. When the stream broke against it, immediately it fell, and the ruin of that house was great. (Luke 6:47–49 ESV)
• And he said, “Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return. The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.” In all this Job did not sin or charge God with wrong. (Job 1:21–22)
• So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited. Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. (2 Cor. 12:7–9 ESV)

Life’s happenings seem to validate our every action through the notion of “cause and effect”. But encouragement comes in knowing that a good-good Father with overall good intentions for His creation is woven into the fiber of every blessing and curse.

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. (Jer. 29:11)

As a Christian, I’ve grown to learn that my hope isn’t in any contributions on Earth (whether it be small or great), it’s in Christ alone — which gives me peace. His blood brought me. His statues renew my mind. His Spirit gives me power. I’ve been lost but now I’m found! Control has been restored to its rightful owner, who’s understanding is not of man — who won’t allow anyone to be plucked from His hands!

My prayer is that those who’ve read this have renewed significance rooted in the Lord. Exploring their uniqueness and purpose through His lens. Able to get out of the rat race of emotional and spiritual grief. We’ve been redeemed out of love — no greater form of love and generosity shall ever compare to Jesus’s sacrifice.

This may have went over someone’s head — and that’s expected. But don’t dwell in ignorance. Send a message to me here if you have any questions. You can also pray, consult with mentors and shepards, and read the Word of God. There is village of Holy Spirit filled people awaiting to serve you with no hidden motive — entreat good counsel.